


Cempasúchil

by Yzazar



Category: Rogue One: A Star Wars Story (2016), Star Wars - All Media Types
Genre: Alternate Universe - Everyone Lives/Nobody Dies, Bodhi needs to work through some shit, Canon-Typical Violence, Cassian happens to have alot of experience, Fluff and Angst, Getting Together, M/M, Mexican culture
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-05-24
Updated: 2017-05-24
Packaged: 2018-11-04 09:28:02
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,462
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10988100
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Yzazar/pseuds/Yzazar
Summary: A lifetime of struggling to survive under the empire hasn't really prepared Bodhi for pursuing romance.With a little help from the rest of the rogue one crew Cassian is wooed anyways.





	Cempasúchil

**Author's Note:**

> This was suppose to be short and fluffy  
> Forgive me.  
> 

     Like with any traumatic experience it takes Bodhi’s mind and body a long time to process the events of the last few days. After piloting his severely injured crew off of Scarif and making it back to the rebel base on Yavin 4 his body succumbs to exhaustion and he collapses.

      He sleeps for a full day and night before he’s woken up by a nightmare. In his dreams the Bor Gullet is still invading his mind, destroying everything it comes across, driving him slowly insane. He claws his way to consciousness and is so disoriented when his eyes open that he sits upright and nearly tumbles out of the bed. He is breathing heavily and it takes him a long moment to remember where he is.

     He looks to his left where Chirrut, fresh out of a bacta tank, is sleeping soundly besides a heavily bandaged and snoring Baze. Bodhi squeezes his eyes shut as he tries to simultaneously catch his breath and not to throw up.

     “Bodhi.” His eyes snap open at the sound of his name. He looks to his right and sees Cassian who looks groggy and unfocused. Bodhi immediately feels guilty for accidentally having woken him.

     “I’m sorry for disturbing you.” Bodhi says, hyperventilating even harder with tears welling in his eyes. Cassian shakes his head, slightly grimacing in pain.

     “I can’t sleep anyways.” Cassian lies, the words coming out slowly. “You ... are alright.” he mutters while staring at Bodhi. It takes him a moment but Bodhi realizes that Cassian is pumped full of painkillers thus slightly incoherent.

     “Are you asking me if I’m alright?” Bodhi whispers hysterically, tears blurring his vision. Cassian frowns processing what Bodhi is saying before speaking again.

     “Breath Bodhi,” he says, taking a deep breath himself “You are safe.” Cassian breaths in deeply then out again, indicating with his hand for Bodhi to follow. Bodhi copies Cassian's breathing and for along time he and Cassian just stare at one another, breathing.

     It takes Bodhi a long time to calm down but Cassian stays awake with him the entire time. At dawn a medic comes in to wheel Cassian away for his turn in the Bacta tank. “You are alright.” Cassian says again before he goes, and Bodhi wants to believe him. 

 

* * *

 

     Cassian Andor’s voice is what had finally drawn his thought together after the Bor Gullet. It was such a pleasant voice, it was so easy to stop his stumbling mind and focus on it.Sitting in medical, listening to Cassian read aloud to Chirrut while Baze sleeps, Bodhi finds that it is still easy.

      Out of them all Bodhi is the least physically injured but mentally he’s taken a beating and only time will tell to what extent. All the medics can recommend for his mental trauma is time, rest, and anxiety pills. So he stays with the healing Chirrut, Cassian and Baze. Jyn is also injured but she has chosen to stay by her father's comatose body in a separate but secure room.

     She still visits for every meal savoring the fresh meals that the kitchen happily provides the victorious rogue one crew. They all take delight in introducing Bodhi to their favorite meals and laughing at his reactions.

     It is Cassian's turn to share his preferred meal and when Bodhi takes one bite the dish falls from his hands and smashes into the ground. The taste is so familiar, so shocking to his system, that suddenly all the feelings he has been attempting to repress seem to claw their way up his throat. Without a word he stands and flees. He only gets as far as the empty hallway before he falls heavily against a wall and falls to the ground.

     He feels guilty, how could he so easily have forgotten about Jedha. How could he, in good conscious, smile and be happy when so many were dead. Their murders still free somewhere in the universe. He is hyperventilating again when Cassian finds him and slides down the wall to sit besides him.

    “Breath Bodhi,” He says and this time instead of listening Bodhi claps a hand over his mouth and shakes his head head violently as sobs begin wracking his thin frame. Cassian throws an arm around his shaking frame and begins rubbing soothing circles on Bodhi’s back.

     “Let it out.” Cassian says holding him tightly and Bodhi does. He cries long and hard, his face buried in his hands, wrapped securely in Cassian's arms. Eventually Bodhi’s sobs lessen as he attempts to regain control, ashamed to be crying in public. He slowly sits up and pulls away, though Cassian's hand stays around him.

     “You didn’t have to follow me.” Bodhi says 

     “Yes I did,” counters Cassian “I am the only one that can walk.” he says attempting humor. It makes Bodhi scoff, because he knows that Jyn is doing much better than Cassian in the ‘walking unaided’ department. They remain silent while Bodhi struggles with the emotions that are still attempting escape him.

     “So much was lost.” Bodhi whispered suddenly, his grief pouring out of him. “When the Jedi fell and the holy city was ransacked my people tried to protect and preserve what they could, but the Empire was vicious.” Bodhi begins to cry in earnest again, his words flowing out. “They murdered thousands, anyone who resisted died or disappeared, but we kept telling ourselves no matter what happen, so long as we protected our culture and passed it to the next generation, we would endure. We kept saying that so long as the knowledge survived we would endure.” Bodhi stops speaking, attempting to control his crying and failing.

     “I betrayed them!” he suddenly wails “I stopped believing, I‒I stopped believing in the rebellion.” he’s sobbing uncontrollably “I’m sorry, I’m sorry, I’m sorry” he repeats over and over and over again. His people faced eradication and in the end a tired, starving, desperate Bodhi fled; joining the very order that subjected them to annihilation.

     “Bodhi‒Bodhi listen to me.” Cassian says grasping Bodhi’s shoulders and forcing the pilot to look at him. “Never apologize for surviving.” Cassian says forcefully “Never apologize for what you did to survive.” Bodhi does stop apologizing, but he know he will carry the guilt with him for a long time to come. Once again he finds himself being soothed my Cassian’s voice.

     “You still can rebuild,” Cassian finally says “Your culture lives with survivors like you, Chirrut and Baze. It will not be easy but Jedha City can be rebuilt.” Cassian gently wipes away Bodhi’s tears “There is always hope, for you and your people.” Cassian's words do much to calm him and Bodhi nods shakily through his tears.

     “I think I would like to do that,” he finally says “I want to one day restore Jedha”

     “Chirrut and Baze will be happy to hear it.” Cassian says hugging Bodhi tightly. Bodhi relishes the physical contact and he stays in Cassian's arms. Bodhi cries for a bit more before eventually he composes himself, surprised to find he feels slightly better.

     “I’m sorry,”Bodhi says his head still resting his head against Cassian “I’ve been entirely selfish, I’m not the only one who lost things.”

     “No,” Cassian agrees “but that does not make your pain any less important.” Bodhi feels overwhelmingly grateful towards Cassian.

     “Would you like to talk about your home?” Bodhi offers, it seemed only fair to offer Cassian an opportunity vent as well. Cassian is silent for so long Bodhi worries he might have offended him, but eventually he speaks.

     “My planet was invaded years ago,” Cassian confesses almost reluctantly “There was years of wars but in the end the invaders colonized and everything became so mixed that my family lost much of their native culture.”

     “I’m sorry” Bodhi says softly, unsure how else to respond.

     “So am I,” Cassian says, sounding self depreciating “but without that mix I would not be here… even if I am not sure if that is good or bad...” Bodhi reaches out to grasp Cassian's hand.

     “Don’t say that,” Bodhi whispered “I’m very glad you're here.”

     “I don’t have a heritage like yours Bodhi.” Cassian suddenly says squeezing his hand tightly “My history is mixed and my culture was pieced together by invaders and a people desperate to keep their own culture alive, in the end even that was taken away from me.” Cassian sighs deeply before continuing “My family fled before I was even born, when they died all I had left was old memories and whatever I could teach myself.” he sounded miserable.

     “That is still something to be proud of” Bodhi says, wishing he could comfort Cassian in the same way the captain had done for him. “All those experiences made you who you are today and someone once told me to never apologize for surviving,” Bodhi pulls back to gaze at him earnestly “but I think it is more important to never apologize for existing.” Cassian looks so startled and then unexpectedly he laughs. Bodhi feels his chest tighten, but it is a good pain, like his heart is jumping for joy. Unfortunately Cassian’s laughter is cut short by a loud groan.

     “ah, that hurt.” Cassian announced clutching his side.

     “You should be resting in bed not sitting on the floor!” Bodhi admonished him, jumping up.

     “I think you need to help me up.” Cassian admits sheepishly. Together they hobble back into their room. Jyn, Chirrut, and Baze are discussing the weather of all things as if they hadn’t been listening intensely to conversation occurring just outside their door. Also none of them had left medical in days, but Bodhi and Cassian choose to ignore that. Jyn offers to share her dish with Bodhi and together they all continue to eat.

     “This is delicious,” Baze says with his mouth full. Chirrut smiles and agrees,

     “It tastes like home.”

 

* * *

 

      Bodhi spends most of the time sleeping, which is apparently a symptom of his mind trying to repair itself, but any waking moments are spent in the company of Cassian .

     “Here try this,” Cassian says holding something out to him. Bodhi eyes it critically, he normally enjoys whatever Cassian offers him but this flat round lump of packed sand doesn’t look very appealing.

     “What is it?” he asks making Cassian snicker while unwrapping it to carefully break off a piece.

     “It is from my home planet” Cassian says and reaches to offer Bodhi a piece again. Unthinkingly Bodhi leans forward and eats the offered food straight off of Cassian’s fingers. Cassian goes still as his fingers brush against Bodhi’s lips. His fingers almost lose grip of the offered treat and Bodhi’s tongue flicks out swiping them before he pulls back, thoughtfully savoring the treat.

     “It’s alright, a little dry, but good!” he says grinning. His brain suddenly seems to catch up with his actions and realizes that Cassian is staring at him intensely and before he can think to apologize Cassian is offering him another piece, the intention unmistakable. Bodhi can feel himself blushing but he leans in again this time taking the offered food much more slowly, the weight of Cassian's gaze on him heavy. Of course before his lips can meet Cassian's fingers again the candy disintegrates and fall into Bodhi’s lap. After a second long pause they both burst into giggles, their heated moment interrupted. Bodhi decided that watching Cassian laugh while apologizing is just as good though

 

* * *

 

     The less said about the days following the destruction of Alderaan the better. The war would not wait for them to recover. Cassian and Jyn push themselves through medical examinations to be cleared for intelligence missions. Bodhi decides to works as a ship mechanic and waits for the day medical clears him so he can join the ranks of rebel pilots. Baze and Chirrut, unfortunately, are still healing from their wounds, but have already asked to take part of training new rebels. So with a few days of recovery, and a few moments of happiness to sustain them, they return to war. 

 

* * *

 

     It hits him the day Cassian leaves for the first time, when he awkwardly mumbles a farewell to Bodhi and offers him a handshake that becomes a long hug. Bodhi is not a fool, he knows that he has feelings for Cassian and unless he’s misread the situation entirely, Cassian was interested in something as well.

     Bodhi however was not sure how to tell Cassian. The only experience he has that even comes close was propositioning fellow cargo pilots for a quick one off, but he has a feeling that perhaps the same rules don't apply to a proper romantic relationship. After much internal debate he decides that Chirrut and Baze might have some answers.

     “How should I ask Cassian out?” He asks making Baze snort, laughing loudly into the datapad he was reading aloud, while Chirrut smiles brightly.

     “So the Captain has finally made his intentions clear!” Chirrut crows loudly as Bodhi blushes.

     “I suppose he has,” Bodhi finally says “But I’m not sure of the appropriate response or actions to take now,” he confesses. “I was hoping you could offer me some advice.” Once again Baze burst into laughter.

     “You came to the wrong couple, pilot,” Baze says “ Chirrut nearly cracked my skull open with his staff and when I woke up I decided to keep him.” Baze says this with much good humor but Chirrut is frowning lightly.

     “You make it sound so unromantic!” he scolds Baze.

     “It wasn’t romantic!” Baze retort. Chirrut ignores him and continues talking to Bodhi.

     “He was pining for months and he could barely speak to me!” Chirrut said taking obvious delight in Baze’s grumbling.

     “but I did speak to you!” Baze counters

     “Yes, and your first words to me ever were to challenge me to a fight!” Chirrut says making Bodhi grin. Baze was glaring at Chirrut but he was clearly trying not to smile.

     “Yes well it worked didn’t it?” Baze finally says.

     “Only because I was so frustrated I hit you hard enough to render you unconscious!” Chirrut declared “I felt so guilty I spent the night nursing him back to health.” Baze guffaws before speaking.

     “Nursing me back to health? Is that what it’s called these day?” Bodhi chokes on his own spit but giggles his way through it.  He spends the rest of the afternoon in their company laughing as they tell him about their messy and highly irregular courtship. It is an afternoon filled with laughter and Bodhi’s heart aches with happiness. Chirrut eventually advises him to be open with Cassian, communication is always best. He wants what they have, so he lets himself dream. 

 

* * *

 

     He doesn’t mean to ask Jyn for advice, but while visiting her and sitting besides Galen's sleeping body, he sees her tired eyes waiting for her father to wake up and in attempts to distract her it slips out.

    “I have feelings for Cassian.” he says quietly. That makes Jyn scoff and smile softly.

    “Of course you do,” Jyn says “When he is here you spend half the time staring at him and the other half he’s staring at you.” Bodhi smiles bashfully ducking his head to hid his hiding his blushing face behind a hand. “Are you going to do anything about it?” Jyn asks. Bodhi pauses for a moment debating what to tell her.

    “I want to,” he confesses “I’m just not very sure how to express my intentions.” Jyn shrugged

    “Doesn’t seem too hard,” she says “just tell him you want to sleep with him and drag him to bed.” her teasing tone and mischievous grin making him blush even harder

    “That is exactly what Baze said.” Jyn chuckles lightly, her eyes fond. They fall into a comfortable silence before Bodhi speaks again.

     “I know the mechanics of starting a physical relationship, that is not the problem,” he says trying to put his doubts into words “but I have no experience or knowledge as to how to ... convey to Cassian that I want more.” Jyn eyes him curiously.

     “That’s a lot to ask of him, especially during a war.” She finally says. Bodhi feels himself deflate. He knows that, but he can’t help but want. After a long pause Jyn continues to speak. “I asked my mother how she met my father and she said that they had been working together for month and he had hardly notice her, but one day she brought him flowers.” she says, Bodhi simply looked confused but Jyn continued “He said he was so surprised by her boldness that he almost immediately fell in love with her.” Jyn smiled sadly as she took her father's hand into hers. She looked up to Bodhi who was still confused as to why she was telling him his this story.

     “Flowers seem to be an appropriate opening bid for courtship in many star systems. I don’t think it could hurt to give him flowers.” She finally said with a small smile “I can’t imagine Cassian has ever received flowers, it might be nice for him.” Bodhi smiles at her brightly. He doesn't think she’s ever had much experience with romance either but she was still trying to help and that meant the world to him. The next day she leaves to trade more information with Saw Guerrera; she is after all the only person who can get close to him, and there is news that her mother might still live. When she leaves he promised to look after Galen. 

 

* * *

 

     Once Cassian was able to move about more freely without aide the first thing he did was restore a backup of K-2SO. Though they didn’t all show it, they were all pleased to have their resident snarky droid back. Even if the droid itself was fucking unimpressed that the only replacement droid that was compatible was the severed head of an outdated imperial droid.

     “No, don’t mind me,” The severed head said from its position atop the workbench where K was slowly being pieced together. “I only died for you all, take your time putting me back together.” Bodhi rolled his eyes.

     “Would you have rather let Cassian pick out all your parts himself?” Bodhi asked “This way at least you have a choice in your appearance.” the droid hummed seemingly thoughtful before speaking.

     “Cassian does have terrible taste.” Bodhi can’t help but smile despite feeling slightly offended on behalf of Cassian.

     “Oh I don’t know, Cassian sent over these arms, apparently ripped off the newest Imperial droid available.” Bodhi lifts his cargo into K’s line of sight and the Droid is silent for a long moment.

     “I suppose they'll do.” The droid says, attempting to sound indifferent but Bodhi is starting to know better.

     “Are they a suitable color or would you like me to paint them?” Bodhi asks as he set them down in front of K2.

     “You could do that?” K2 finally asks rather quietly. Bodhi smiles.

     “Certainly,” He says “what color would you like?” K2 remains silent as if contemplating. “What is Cassian's favorite color?” Bodhi abruptly asks, attempting to sound nonchalant. When K2 still says nothing he glances up and Bodhi could almost swear that the droid is staring at him with a distinctly amused expression. “I like green,” Bodhi says attempting to cover up his embarrassment "but that’s probably not the most discreet color, then again neither is the bright resistant orange, but that doesn’t seem to stop them.” he rambles on, slightly flustered.

     “Cassain likes orange flowers.” K2 interrupts, making him even more flustered.

     “Who said anything about flowers?” Bodhi mutters.

     “Jyn did, this morning!” K2 sounds positively jovial as he continues “Do you want to know the probability of finding the right flowers without my help?” Bodhi can’t help but grin.

     “You know Cassian's flower preferences?” he asks the droid while rummaging through paint colors. K2 chooses to ignore what ever Bodhi is trying to imply.

     “In all the years I’v been with Cassian I’ve only seen him in possession of one type of flower, and he goes to great lengths to acquire them.” Bodhi is silent while digesting the information, when he finally finds the color he’s looking for he returns to the K’s side.

     “Will you help me obtain them then?” he asks

     “Only if you help me attach my arms.” K2 bargains. Bodhi holds up the paint.

     “Deal, now how about this color?” K2 stares at resistance orange and sighs.

     “Well, if you insist.”K2 says, though the tone doesn’t seem unhappy at all.

 

* * *

 

     Bodhi finds himself in possession of a bouquet of puffy orange flowers on a most remarkable day. The death star has been destroyed and Galen Erso has finally awoken. After speaking briefly with Galen, Bodhi excuses himself so that father and daughter can reconnect. When he leaves Jyn and her father are crying tears of joy while trying to fill void of 15 lost years. When Bodhi had last seen Baze and Chirrut they had been busy quietly conversing while wrapped around one another in Medical, Bodhi wisely leaves them alone. He runs into newly reassembled K-2SO having a loud discussion with a golden droid and is pointed towards Cassian's location.

     He reaches the hanger where the heavily damages U-wing that Bodhi stole on Eadu, is being repaired. It’s the same U-wing he had flown to rescue Chirrut, Baze, Jyn, and Cassian on that damned beach. Seeing it again fills Bodhi with more emotion than he knows what to do with. So much has changed in so little time and he is so different. The distant sounds of celebration and the knowledge that he played a vital part in the victory that is being celebrated gives him the courage he needs to step into the open cargo hold. He finds Cassian in the pilot's seat, seemingly lost in thought. A dragged footstep alerts the captain that he is not alone, making him whirl around to face Bodhi, who is suddenly regretting not planning this better. Cassian is out of his seat and half way to Bodhi before he notices the flowers.

    “Where did you get those?” Cassian asks stopping dead in his tracks his voice filled with wonder.

    “They’re for you.” Bodhi say choosing to follow Chirrut’s advice and simply be honest and open. “Jyn suggested it and K2 helped me get them.” Cassian slowly began approached him again.

    “Why would you do that?” he asked, sounding less confused and more hopeful than the question suggested. Bodhi, having always been good at gambling, goes all in.

    “Because I want what Baze and Chirrut have,” Bodhi says softly, “and I think that with you, a life like that might be possible.” Cassian’s eyes are shining and the smile that grows on his face is brighter that the setting sun currently illuminating the hanger. The anxiety that had been eating away at Bodhi was slowly being replaced by incandescent happiness as Cassian slowly places one hand on Bodhi’s hip while grasping the offered flowers in the other.

    “A life filled with constant arguing?” Cassian asks in a teasing tone.

    “A life where I could fall in love and grow old with you.” Bodhi says , gently reaching up to cup Cassian's face between his hands.

    “I would like such a life,” Cassian confesses tilting his head slightly to gently kiss the palm of Bodhi's right hand. Bodhi is trembling in anticipation as Cassian leaned in closer to whisper a confession. “I also dream of a life with you.” He finally says and kisses Bodhi. It's gentle, filled with hope, and it’s a start. 

 

* * *

 

     Later, much later, when they are lying in Cassian’s bed wrapped in each other and talking about their life before and planning their life ahead Cassian will ask Bodhi “Why these flowers?”

     “K2 said they were your favorite.” Bodhi says causing Cassian to laugh loudly.

     “Were those K’s exact words?” Sensing something was amiss Bodhi pulls away to look at Cassian’s face.

     “Is there something wrong with them?” He asks suspicious of the sudden alarm on Cassian’s face.

     “No!” Cassian denies “they are very beautiful.” he says before pulling Bodhi back in for a kiss. Bodhi lets himself be kissed but doesn’t let himself be distracted.

     “The truth, Cassian.” Bodhi demands between kisses. When Cassian says nothing Bodhi resorts to more drastic measures and pulls away entirely, making Cassian groan.

     “Tell me.” Bodhi insists. Cassian stares at Bodhi with an unreadable expression on his face before he sighs and gives in.

     “Don't be upset,” Cassian warns making Bodhi suddenly nervous.

     “Oh no,” Bodhi moans “What’s wrong with them?” Cassian seems to debate whether or not to tell Bodhi before he finally spits it out.

     “They are flowers for the dead.” Cassian admits. Bodhi looks both startled and horrified. “Which is not a bad thing!” Cassian says quickly “They are just traditionally used on my home planet to commemorate and honor the dead; and I actually like them very much and I am very happy that you gave them to me.” Cassian finishes rather weakly, waiting for Bodhi’s response. Bodhi blinks several times as he processes Cassian’s rushed speech before he suddenly pushes Cassian away to stand up.

     “That clanking droid!” Bodhi whispers to himself, blushing darkly “K2 knew! And K2 just let me ‒ ! I’m going to disassemble that deceitful piece of‒!”Cassian quickly stood up, wrapping his arms around Bodhi who was already halfway to the door.

     “Please don’t do that.” Cassian said “It took a long time to put K back together.”

     “I know!” Bodhi hisses indignantly “I helped! ‒Why are you smiling!?” Cassian is indeed smiling fondly as he gathers Bodhi’s hands in his and pulls them to his lips.

     “Because I want to show you the traditions and customs of my family” Cassian says kissing Bodhi’s hands “I want to celebrate and practice them all with you,” Cassian confesses softly “and I want to learn about your traditions and culture.” Bodhi’s emotions shift quickly, just another side effect the medics say, but he doesn’t care because he’s euphoric as he nodded along to Cassian’s words.

     “That sounds wonderful.” Bodhi whispers and he knows just where to begin “What are the flowers called?” Cassian smiles and kisses him again before pressing his forehead against Bodhi’s and he whispers.

“Cempasúchil.” The word sounds brilliant to Bodhi and he hopes for a future where he can hear Cassian speak in his Mother tongue more often. He hopes Cassian will teach him to speak it and he hopes to return the favor. Standing with Cassian, both of them awake because of nightmares and insomnia, Bodhi can't help but hold on to Cassian and dream of a future with him.  

**Author's Note:**

> They live happily ever after.  
> I've Decided.  
>   
> This is the prettiest one I've ever 
> 
> Grammar is a colonialist construct and spelling is subjective. In other words I’m doing my best! I’m a student whose job is to teach math and whose first language was Spanish and it was mostly beaten out of me by the american school system. Thus me and english are not on the up and up . ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯ 
> 
> [This](https://rebelpilotbodhirook.tumblr.com/) is my Bodhi Appreciation Sideblog. I post when I remember I have it.


End file.
